Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Thanks for your suggestion Scarlett but I am pretty sure I am not pregnant. I have had my period recently and haven't done anything to get pregnant since. I'm more amused at that than offended. :)
No, I just had a while where I was weak willed and gained and then struggled not to gain. I have the same problem with people offering me food. I am so afraid to offend but then I hate eating any food.
Lately, I think I have been losing weight. I have felt hungry every day, and since I can't really control it when they make me food and watch me eat it, I will stay up all night and sleep off the next day hungry, if I felt I have consumed over 1000 calories.
That's what I did today. I don't know how many calories I had yesterday, but I felt like it was way too much, and so I stayed up until maybe seven in the morning and I have been napping all day since. It is now 8 at night and I am hoping to not have to eat anything until after midnight where I might make myself a cup of noodles (300 calories).
I really feel like I am losing a lot, even though I am terrified that maybe I am not losing anything at all, or sometimes I feel like I am gaining. I haven't been able to weigh myself here at all which is frustrating and yet a relief at the same time. I am super hungry right now but have no interest in eating. My stomach looks flatter in the mirror and feels smaller under my hands when I am laying down. I think my jeans might even be looser. I can't wait to see how much progress I have made.

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