Thursday, May 30, 2013

I can't sleep.
I keep thinking about tomorrow night when I am going over to my parents house to house sit and babysit everyone. They are going on a trip to the city where they are going to move- just my mom and dad that is- and they are moving lots of stuff to storage down there. So they are really going to do it.
I am thinking about moving back in there like I usually think about it.
I hate it here. The pressure of having too much stuff and no space for it all, and the hot water heater breaking, and the fact that I have to clean the room... It's starting to outweigh the cons of living with my parents again. I want my own space back.
The problem is, they may be moving before I can get into a new home. Maybe it will provide my boyfriend with the incentive he needs to get a move on. I need a home. Somehow right now, the fact that I have lived in this shit-hole for two years weighs nothing next to his little amount of debt that he just has to pay off first.
Even if it makes me manic again, I could see it being worth it.
Right now, it feels like nothing is worth anything. I have nowhere to go right now and it is destroying me.

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