Friday, July 20, 2012

"...and hey you should be proud you could have let everything that you have experienced get you down but you have made the best of the bad situation you were handed and you struggle but are still here and i am proud of you <3
stay strong and dont let people get you down.."



Wow Idk why but this makes me really proud and I feel stronger and more confident all of a sudden and at the same time I want to cry. I REALLY have been through Hell and back, but the thing is, I am still standing here. I survived...
Love you Rayya!
It is just POURING out there and I have to go to work soon. Also the thunder sounds like cannons instead of the usual rumbling. This is what woke me up this morning when I was sleeping. It woke me up several times too.
Love you guys!
I think maybe I need to post another thinspo page. I am super motivated (especially by Rayya- you're awesome!) and just have the drive back to go for it hard core.
I have my food card now!
This means lots of coffee and soda and drinks, and very little food, and I don't have to depend on anyone else for it! So excited!
H is gone at R's, which could mean he might be gone until Sunday or Monday or if I am lucky, later than that. I can eat as little as I want when he is gone, so this is my opportunity to get comfortably down into the high or mid 140's before he comes back and then I will have to maintain again until my next opportunity. I will be getting lot's more opportunities though, because H's foot has healed to the point where he will go places again, so half the time he will be gone at R's or gaming, which can turn out to be more than half. Also, my family is driving to the reunion in another state today and will be gone until August so I'm really on my own right now, and hopefully my mom will be able to convince my Grandma that I am worth buying a computer for. I got my GED and I went out on my own and I got a job. Both of my brothers may have graduated, but I worked hard to make my life work too. One is at college, coming home with my parents for break, and the other is a caretaker to a friend of his.
Again, love you all!
Take care! :)